


Everyone Is Gay

by aqqrieved



Category: Smosh
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Crack Treated Seriously, Everyone Is Gay, F/F, Group Chat Fic, Group chat, M/M, Other, Smosh Games - Freeform, Smosh Squad - Freeform, Who am I, wtf is this tbh
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-14
Updated: 2016-11-14
Packaged: 2018-08-30 22:40:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8551978
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aqqrieved/pseuds/aqqrieved
Summary: a shitty group chat fic because tbh we need more of them ft. witz, ianthony, laserhinki, mari/courtney/olivia bc why not??, shayne/noah bc why not, and leakenshire (keith/joven) bC I RAN OUT OF PEOPLE TO SHIP OK





	

**Author's Note:**

> hi okay first off welcome to hell  
> secondly here are the high school years for y'all 
> 
> sophomores: keith, noah, shayne, olivia, courtney  
> juniors: wes, flitz, mari, lasercorn, sohinki  
> seniors: joven  
> out of high school: ian, anthony

**Jovenshire** has added **Sohinki, Lasercorn, FLitz, Wes Johnson, #Saltqueen Takahashi, CoMill, Olivia Sui, Shayne Topp, Noah GROSSman, Keith Leak, Ian HeCOCKS,** and **Anthony Padildo** to the chat **“SMOSH”**

_2:54 p.m._

**Sohinki:** Joven why

 **Lasercorn:** oh god

 **Shayne Topp:** …?

 **Keith Leak:** YALL THIS IS GONNA BE SO LIT

 **Jovenshire:** SEE AT LEAST KEITH APPRECIATES ME

 **FLitz:** here we go

 **CoMill:** ooOOOH I’M READY FOR THIS

 **Olivia Sui:** me too!!

 **Noah GROSSman:** whyyyyyy

 **Ian HeCOCKS:** Joven no

 **Jovenshire:** JOVEN YES

 **Keith Leak:** i’m just happy to be here

 **#Saltqueen Takahashi:** iconic

 **Sohinki:** i have to deal with you people at school and now i have this smh

 **#Saltqueen Takahashi:** oh, shut up, you love us

 **Lasercorn:** YEAH

 **CoMill:** yeah, it’s not so bad!!

 **Anthony Padildo:** dear god why

 **Jovenshire:** WHY ARE YOU ALL BEING HATERS

 **FLitz:** i’m dubbing myself the quiet lurker yall im just gonna sit back and let this shit happen

 **Wes Johnson:** Flitz nooo! :(

 **Sohinki:** o shit flitz u gotta listen to him

 **Lasercorn:** yeah flitz come on

 **FLitz:**...i hate you all

 **Wes Johnson:** aww :(

 **Jovenshire:** FLITZ YOU MADE WES SAD

 **Jovenshire:** HE’S ALL FROWNY AND SAD NOW

 **Jovenshire:** YOU MADE HIM SAD IN HIS FAVORITE CLASS

 **Jovenshire:** YOU KNOW HOW MUCH HE LOVES SPANISH

 **Jovenshire:** HE GETS CANDY HERE

_3:14 p.m._

**Wes Johnson:** did i hear candy???!!

 **Jovenshire** has changed **Wes Johnson’s** name to **CandyWes**

 **CandyWes:** yay!! I love candy!!!

 **FLitz:** we know dude

 **Sohinki:** yeah man thats why we filled your locker with candy

 **CandyWes:** REALLY????!!!

 **Lasercorn:** GOD DAMN IT SOHINKI

 **Anthony Padildo:** SOHINKI IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A SURPRISE

 **Jovenshire:** SOHINKI FFS

 **Sohinki:** oops

 **CoMill** has changed **Sohinki’s** name to **Surprise Ruiner**

 **Surprise Ruiner** has changed their name to **Sohinki**

 **CoMill:** >:((

 **CandyWes** has changed the group name to **“thanks guys :))”**

 **CandyWes:** O H MY GO D THERE’S SO MUCH CANDY

 **CandyWes:** IT ALL FELL OUT AND EVERYO NE’S LOOKING A T ME

 **CandyWes:** I LOVE YOU GUYS

 **Sohinki:** we love you too wes

 **CoMill:** <3333

 **Olivia Sui:** happy early birthday!!

 **Noah GROSSman:** <3

 **Keith Leak:** <333

 **FLitz:** u better share bc i bought 60% of that

 **CandyWes:** really??

 **FLitz:**...yes?

 **Jovenshire:** it was all flitz’s idea man

 **Lasercorn:** yeah the rest of us just tossed in cheap candy from 5 below

 **#Saltqueen Takahashi:** flitz went to like

 **#Saltqueen Takahashi:** target

 **#Saltqueen Takahashi:** and like actual candy stores

 **Noah GROSSman:** #goals

 **FLitz:** its nbd

 **Olivia Sui:** #witz

 **Ian HeCOCKS:** WITZ I’M WHEE ZING

 **CoMill:** OMG I SHIP IT

 **CandyWes:** haha what??

 **FLitz:** guyS NO

 **Keith Leak:** YALL THEYD BE SO CUUUTE

 **Anthony Padildo:** omfg

 **Jovenshire** changed the group name to **“#WITZ”**

 **CandyWes:** guys omg what’s going on

 **FLitz:** nothin g

 **Noah GROSSman:** omg flitz

 **#Saltqueen Takahashi:** JUST ACCEPT IT FLITZ

 **FLitz:** IM NOT ACCEPTING ANYTHING

 **#Saltqueen Takahashi** changed **FLitz’s** name to **In Denial**

 **In Denial:** IM NOT IN DENIAL THEREs NOTHING TO DENY OMFG

 **CandyWes:**?????? WHATS HAPPENING

 **In Denial:** NOTHING WES DONT WORRY ABOUT IT

 **CandyWes:** NO I WANNA KNOW

 **Jovenshire:** wes meet me by the entrance i’ll tell you

 **CandyWes:** okay

 **In Denial:** JOVEN NO

 **#Saltqueen Takahashi:** OMFG I JUST SAW FLITZ FUCKING SPRINTING DOWN THE STAIRS

 **Noah GROSSman:** DUDE CHILL U ALMOST KNOCKEd ME OVER

 **Jovenshire:** HE FUCKIN TACKLED ME

 **CandyWes:** IVE NEVER BEEN SO CONFUSED IN MY LIFE

 **CandyWes:** WHAT THE FUCK ISGOIN G ON??

 **Ian HeCOCKS:** [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s013grY4zRo ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s013grY4zRo)

**Jovenshire:** I CAME HERE TO HAVE A GOOD TIME AN I’M HONESTLY FEELIN G SO ATTACKED RIGHT NWO

 **Jovenshire:** FLITZ LITERALLY FUKCING TACKLED ME UFCK

 **CandyWes:**??? WHY THO???

 **Jovenshire:** BECAUSE HE DOESNT WAN TYOU TO KNOW HE HAS AC CRnfnblnngblnlb aowegolnbmoiiierjfmv

 **CandyWes:** what???

 **#Saltqueen Takahashi:** for those of you who aren’t here

 **#Saltqueen Takahashi:** flitz kicked jovens phone literally out the door

 **Noah GROSSman:** it was so funny this is great u guys should all come down here

 **CoMill:** omw!!!

 **Olivia Sui:** ^^

 **Keith Leak:** yall i feel like we should have popcorn

 **Shayne Topp:** wait up i wanna see flitz beat up joven to keep his gay secret

 **CandyWes:** gay secret??? is that what this is about??

 **In Denial:** NO

 **In Denial:** SHAYNE STFU

 **In Denial** changed their name to **FLitz**

 **FLitz:** DONT LISTN TO HIM WES

 **Anthony Padildo:** no wes definitely listen to shayne

 **FLitz:** SHUT THE FCKU UP ONG

 **CandyWes:** im so conflicted???? is flitz gay?? flitz u know its okay we accept courtney and noah

 **FLitz:** yeah bud i know its nothing ok dont worry

 **CandyWes:** u can tell me man

 **CandyWes:** youre my best friend!!

 **FLitz** has left the chat

 **CandyWes:** oh no!! did i say something wrong??

 **Sohinki:** nah dude i think hes just

 **Sohinki:** idk actually

 **CandyWes** has added **FLitz** to the chat **“#WITZ”**

 **CandyWes:** flitz whats wrong?

 **FLitz:** can we talk? like... privately?

 **CandyWes:** of course!

 **Sohinki:** what do you think they’re talking about

 **Ian HeCOCKS:** how gay they are for each other probably

 

_3:40 p.m._

**CandyWes:** whats up man??

 **FLitz:** okay so

 **FLitz:** u know how shayne was saying i had a gay secret

 **FLitz:** and everyone was like

 **FLitz:** “witz!!” and shit??

 **CandyWes:** yeah

 **FLitz:** well u see

 **FLitz:** its kinda bc

 **FLitz:** ive had a crush on you since like

 **FLitz:** when u moved here

 **CandyWes:** holy shit

_4:27 p.m._

**FLitz:** Wes?

_5:03 p.m._

**FLitz:** Wes??

 

* * *

 

_3:40 p.m._

**CandyWes** has left the chat

 **Jovenshire:** oh shit

 **Sohinki:** oooooh no

 **Lasercorn:** omg what happened

 **CoMill:** guys this isnt good

 **Olivia Sui:** :(((

 **Noah GROSSman:** has anyone heard anything from either of them??

 **Shayne Topp:** no

 **Keith Leak:** nah fam wtf happened

 **#Saltqueen Takahashi:** i havent

 **Jovenshire:** fuck

 **Jovenshire:** flitz just called me and he’s freaking out

 **Shayne Topp:** fuck i feel really bad

 **Shayne Topp:** i shouldn’t have said what i said

 **Noah GROSSman:** its okay man we all said shit

 **Shayne Topp:** still

 **Shayne Topp:** fuck it since i outed him i guess this will have to be my apology

 **Shayne Topp:** i’m bi

 **Noah GROSSman:** o shit

 **CoMill:** hey congrats!! wish the circumstances were better

 **Olivia Sui:** still love you <3

 **Shayne Topp:** thanks guys

 **Keith Leak:** yall i think you broke noah

 **Keith Leak:** we were playin smash bros and he just dropped his phone and controller and climbed out the window what do i do

 **Keith Leak:** _[ image of Noah climbing out the window ]_

 **Ian HeCOCKS:** oh my god where’s he going

 **Anthony Padildo:** doesnt his window go out to the roof or something

 **Keith Leak:** yall hes just layin on his roof

 **Shayne Topp:** yeah i can see him from my window

 **Shayne Topp:** i’m gonna climb over there and see whats up

 **Keith Leak:** o shit waddup !! i forgot yall were neighbors

 **Keith Leak:** thats lit!! they have a tree connecting their roofs im jealous

 **Keith Leak:** anybody got any ideas on why noah isnt speaking anymore

 **Ian HeCOCKS:** Noah.exe has stop responding

 **CoMill:** whats wrong with him tho :((

 **Olivia Sui:** doesnt he have a crush on shayne

 **Shayne Topp:** what

 **Noah GROSSman:** OLIVIA NO

 **Noah GROSSman:** FUUUUUUUUCK

 **Shayne Topp:** um

 **Noah GROSSman:** um

 **Noah GROSSman:** i guess the cats out of the bag???

 **Shayne Topp:** are u for real

 **Noah GROSSman:** um.. yes?

 **Keith Leak:** YALL SHAYNE JUST KISSED NOAH THIS IS NOT A DRILL

 **Olivia Sui:** OMG <33 :D

 **CoMill:** yaaaASSS

 **Ian HeCOCKS:** NICE

 **Anthony Padildo:** ABOUT TIME

 **Jovenshire:** i dont mean to ruin the happy times but uh

 **Jovenshire:** wes is gone

 **Jovenshire:** like idk where he is

 **#Saltqueen Takahashi:** oh shit really??

 **Jovenshire:** yeah like hes not at his house or anything

 **FLitz:** guys i fucked up

 **FLitz:** i told him i liked him and now hes gone

 **FLitz:** this is all my fault

 **CoMill:** flitz no!! its not your fault :((

 **Keith Leak:** yall we gotta find him

 **Keith Leak:** and get me away from these losers

 **Jovenshire:** im getting the Ovenshire Mobile

 **Anthony Padildo:** you mean your mom’s minivan?

 **Jovenshire:** listen here you little shit

_4:30 p.m._

**Jovenshire:** okay fresh gays and keith get in the Ovenshire Mobile

 **Keith Leak:** FRESH GAYS Yall crack me up im dead

 **Ian HeCOCKS** has changed **Shayne Topp’s** name to **fresh gay #1**

 **Ian HeCOCKS** has changed **Noah GROSSman’s** name to **fresh gay #2**

 **fresh gay #2:** guys why

 **fresh gay #1:** ok

 **Ian HeCOCKS:** bc u are fresh gays

 **Jovenshire:** gET IN THE FUCKING C A R

 **Jovenshire:** WE HAVE A CANDY OBSESSED MANCHILD TO FIND

 **Jovenshire:** FLITZ IM COMING TO YOU NEXT

 **FLitz:** okay

 **FLitz:** but are you sure i should go?

 **FLitz:** im the one who chased him off

 **Ian HeCOCKS:** me and anthony are going to get olivia mari and courtney

 **Jovenshire:** ok

 **Jovenshire:** flitz you definitely should be going because you two need to talk

 **Keith Leak:** ok at first it was cute but now yall gotta chiLL

 **CoMill:**???

 **Keith Leak:** THEY WON’T STOP KISSING

 **Anthony Padildo:** LMAO

 **Jovenshire:** FLITZ GET YOUR FINE ASS OUT HERE

 **Ian HeCOCKS:** joven thats gay

 **Jovenshire:** SO ARE YOU

 **Anthony Padildo:** o shit he got u

 **Jovenshire:** YOU TOO PADILDO

 **fresh gay #2** has changed **Ian HeCOCKS’s** name to **old gay #1**

 **fresh gay #2** has changed **Anthony Padildo’s** name to **old gay #2**

 **fresh gay #2:** PAYBACK

 **Keith Leak:** exposed

 **old gay #1:** listen we’re not old

 **old gay #2:** yeah just because we graduated last year doesn’t make us old

 **old gay #2:** you guys are Children

 **old gay #1:** quite literally

 **Keith Leak** has changed their name to **lonely gay**

 **lonely gay:** i felt left out

 **Jovenshire** has changed their name to **lonely gay #2**

 **lonely gay:** o shit waddup

 **lonely gay #2:** :)

 **old gay #1:** holy fuck

 **old gay #1:** are you guys thinking what i’m thinking

 **fresh gay #2:** OH SHIT

 **old gay #1** has changed the group name to **“#LEAKENSHIRE”**

 **lonely gay #2:** gUYS NO

 **lonely gay:** haha lmao

 **fresh gay #1:** o shit we broke keith

 **fresh gay #1:** he was laughing and then he suddenly stopped and looked up

 **fresh gay #1:** now hes looking at joven weird

 **fresh gay #2:** i think keith has caught Feelies

 **lonely gay:** yall what the fuck

 **lonely gay:** i didnt ask for this shit

 **lonely gay #2:** u ok??

 **lonely gay #2:** also flitz we’re here

 **FLitz:** i was gone for like 10 minutes what the fuck

_4:56 p.m._

**lonely gay:** yall when did joven get so hot

 **fresh gay #1:** whoop there it is

 


End file.
